Hurting With The Hurting

Good morning, friends. It's good to be back with you. Craig did a great job with last week's message. We had the opportunity a week ago to move our daughter Kira from Knoxville, Tennessee to Joplin, Missouri, where she's starting a summer long internship with Christ and youth. And that gave me the opportunity while we were in Joplin last weekend to actually be with my mom on Mother's Day for the first time in at least 25 years.

So that was a. It was a good thing.

Thank you. Yeah. One of the occupational hazards of working Sundays is that days like Mother's Day, when your mom lives three states away, are difficult to get together. So grateful to do that, but grateful to get to be back here with you, you know? For our 25th anniversary, Allison and I took our first trip to an all inclusive resort in Cozumel in Mexico, where we hung out every day in these lounge chairs overlooking the Caribbean.

There's this spot right here, this little balcony that we would try to get down there early in the morning so. So we could be the first people to stake that out and have immediate access to the water. We snorkeled with tropical fish every day. This hotel sits right on coral reefs, so we're just able to walk right to the edge of the balcony, drop right into the water and snorkel with tropical fish. And anytime we got hungry or thirsty, one of the perks of all inclusive resorts is you could order food or drink poolside or via room service, or you could go to one of the on site restaurants.

So for a week, we relaxed and we read and we slept and we swam and we snacked and we barely lifted a finger and it was great. And it would be really unhealthy to get used to that. I mean, it wouldn't take much of that kind of living to become spoiled and entitled and self absorbed. Imagine just living in a world where you sit by the pool and bring me a cheeseburger and a quesadilla. You know, it's like.

And nachos and they just would keep it coming. There's some beautiful resorts in the Caribbean, and life at those resorts is often very different from life outside. If you visited any of those resorts, you know what I'm talking about. Beyond those resort walls. Many people in those parts of the world live in third world poverty.

And as long as we stay inside the resort, we are insulated from the, the needs and the hurts of the world outside. And that reality reminds me of a text in the book of famous Philippians in the New Testament. Where the apostle Paul wrote these words. Paul said, in your relationships with one another have the same mindset as Christ Jesus. And then Paul began to quote the lyrics of an ancient Christian hymn when he said, who being in very nature, God did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage.

Rather he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant. Being made in human likeness and being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross. Jesus could have chosen to stay inside the resort of heaven. He was entitled to that. He belonged there.

But the entire story of scripture is how God's love for our broken world prompted him to to put on flesh and enter right into our pain. The Old Testament prophet Isaiah reminds us that Jesus came to earth not as a celebrity, not as a dignitary, not as a conqueror, but as a sacrificial servant. Isaiah referred to Jesus as a man of suffering and familiar with pain. And it wasn't just his own pain that Jesus dealt with. In John chapter 11, Jesus Friend whose name was Lazarus, died.

And before Jesus miraculously raised his friend back to life, he was confronted by Lazarus grieving sisters Mary and Martha. And even knowing that he was about to resurrect his friend, John tells us that Jesus wept. When Jesus saw people grieving, he cared for them. He was moved with compassion. Over and over, the wife of Jesus modeled a couple of core principles that are really central to our church's love, grow and inspire mission.

For starters, we see throughout scripture that we love others by showing up. During my undergrad studies, I had a part time student ministry in a little town called Cassville, Missouri. Town of about 2,000 people, about 60 miles south and east of Joplin where I went to school. So for two years I drove back and forth between Cassville and Joplin at least twice a week. And as I made that drive hundreds of times, I broke up the monotony by finding every possible route between point A and point B.

When I'd come across the road I hadn't traveled before, I would turn and I would take it just to see where it went. And as I did that, I discovered a bunch of these tiny little towns, some of them very little more than a stop sign or a church or maybe a gas station if they were really happening. The kind of towns we say that if you blink, you'll miss it. And life is full of moments like that. Solomon wrote in Proverbs that a friend loves at all times.

Friendship is not a lever that we pull only when it's convenient. It is a commitment to be there for others, and many of our opportunities to encourage people are a lot like small towns. If we blink, we'll miss them. Now, to be fair, it isn't possible for any of us to be there for everybody all the time. It isn't possible for any of us to make it to every single thing we're ever invited to.

Which is why the church is a community of many people and not just a couple of us. But it's a significant thing for us to participate however we can in key moments in people's lives. Often those blink and you'll miss it. Opportunities to show love and friendship coincide with some of our happy moments. Birthday parties Graduation Open houses Weddings Housewarming parties Baby showers when the Apostle Paul wrote in Romans chapter 12 to rejoice with those who rejoice, he reminded us that love means celebrating with others when they celebrate.

And sometimes that's easy, like when somebody else has the same birthday as you. My birthday is January 28th, and I'm not sure exactly how this worked out, but but Greenwood, Indiana seems to be the epicenter of people who have January 28th as a birthday. So every January I've got a list of people that I reach out to and try to wish them a happy birthday before they do the same for me. It's pretty easy to rejoice when others rejoice when somebody else gets a new car that's just like yours, or somebody else comes to work at the same company where you're already employed, or someone else moves into the neighborhood where you and your family just built a new home? Sometimes, though, our own emotional struggles can actually get in the way of our ability to rejoice with others.

Can you congratulate a friend on their promotion when your career feels kind of stuck? Or can you rejoice with someone else over their new home when you're still in a rental situation that you'd really like to get out of? Or can you celebrate a friend's wedding when you're still single but you really don't want to be? Or can you genuinely celebrate a friend's pregnancy when you and your spouse are currently battling fertility issues? See, sometimes showing up to celebrate with others requires us to deal with some of our own feelings of jealousy or even resentment.

But when we make the decision to do that, when we decide I'm going to rejoice with those who rejoice, even when it's difficult, we actually pour a lot into other people's encouragement tanks. Think back with me to some of the highlight reel moments in your life. Maybe an especially memorable birthday or a surprise party, something like that. Maybe it was a recital, a music recital or a dance recital. Maybe it was a sport event or a whole season of them, or multiple seasons of them.

Maybe it was your graduation or your wedding. I'll bet when you think back to those moments, you can picture the faces of certain people who cared enough about you to show up and be there to rejoice when you were rejoicing. I'm curious. Who will remember you that way? Who will remember me as one of those people who showed up to celebrate with them?

We love others by showing up. That principle is always true. And it's not just true when times are good. If you're familiar with that Proverbs 17 text and the Romans 12 text that I highlighted a few moments ago, you know that I only quoted half of them. Solomon didn't just write a friend loves at all times.

He went on to say, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. And Paul didn't just say, rejoice with those who rejoice. He added, mourn with those who mourn. It's great to have friends to have fun with. We all want to have people to golf with or vacation with, people to get together and do fun things with.

But we often need our friends the most, don't we, when we're hurting? So we need to remember that number two. We love others by showing up when life gets hard. The Old Testament Book of Job is a hard book to read. Job is the story of a man named Herschel.

I'm just seeing if you're awake or not. A man named Job who had great faith, he had godly character, and he was extremely wealthy. And the opening verses of the Book of Job tell us that God was extremely pleased with Job. So Satan said, the only reason Job worships you is because you've given him such a charmed existence. If Job's life suddenly got hard, he would no longer honor you.

And God gave Satan permission to meddle in Job's life, barring him only from harming Job personally. So by Satan's doing in invaders swooped in and they stole Job's livestock and killed most of his farmhands. And then fire consumed Job's sheep and his shepherds. And then a powerful wind blew down the house where Job's seven sons and daughters were gathered and killed all of them. You talk about being hit from all sides.

Any one of those Facets of Job's grief would be difficult for us to imagine, perhaps let alone all of them just stacked right on top of one another. But even after all that loss, this is really the central theme of the Book of Job. Job clung to his faith in God. So Satan prodded again and he said to God, if you take away Job's health, he'll renounce his faith and he will curse you. So God gave Satan permission to physically afflict Job but not to kill him.

And Satan caused Job to develop these painful sores all over his body. Like I said, Job is a hard story to read and to process, but it illustrates certain things that are important for us to grasp. One of those is that Satan is cruel and evil. His mission is to destroy and demoralize, to ruin whatever is good and joyful and life giving. He is responsible for much of our world's pain.

And yet we also see in the Book of Job that God limits Satan. The devil wreaks a lot of havoc, but only within the bounds of what God permits. We also see that God is often blamed for what Satan does. God didn't cause the tragedies that Job faced. But when we experience pain, we are often tempted to assume it's God's fault.

And Job also provides us some insight and into helping those who are hurting for today's purposes. Specifically, I want us to notice what happened next in the Book of Job. About the middle of Job, chapter two we read when Job's three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Nemethite. I'm going to pause there just long enough to share this fun fact with you. When I was in Bible college, one of my Old Testament professors was like to ask his classes, do you guys know who the shortest person in the Bible was?

And everyone would raise their hands and say Zacchaeus. And he would say, no, it was actually Bill, dad, because he was only shoe height. You're welcome and I'm sorry. Yeah, it's all Brother Field's fault. Anyway.

When Job's friends heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and they met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him. They began to weep aloud and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him because they saw how Great.

His suffering was. So Job's friends saw him walking a very painful and sorrowful road and they showed up. And when they got there, Job's grief was so overwhelming and his appearance was so haggard that they barely recognized him. And they joined Job in his sorrow. They mourned with those who mourn.

They wept and they tore their clothes and they sprinkled dust on their heads. Those are all common, ancient Middle Eastern expressions of grief. And they, they sat. Did you notice that they sat in silence with Job? That's something many of us find hard to do, don't you think?

I mean, we're uncomfortable with grief and we're even more uncomfortable with silence. So when someone we know experiences a loss, we often feel unnecessarily compelled to say something like, God just needed another flower in his garden.

Everything happens for a reason. Your loved one is in a better place. And those well meaning but trite words often imply some really questionable things. If we think about it like, you know, even with all God's power and wisdom, he just couldn't find it in himself to function without your loved one in heaven with him. Do we really believe in a God who is that needy or God intentionally took your loved one's life?

Do we believe that God is in the business of regularly just randomly killing people? Or we imply sometimes everybody goes to heaven, which is actually the opposite of what Jesus taught. Do we believe that just because someone is hurting that we suddenly have the authority to declare somebody else's eternal destination? Now if you've read the rest of Job, you know, his friends didn't remain silent much longer than those initial seven days. And when they decided to stop being silent and start dispensing advice, they suddenly became much less helpful to him.

Their compassionate, caring presence was actually more valuable than their words were. And that reminds me of a story that my dad shared with me. I was, I'm barely able to remember this, but when I was little, my dad had a co worker whose name was David Casey.

One day several members of their team were driving to an event in a multi vehicle caravan when a drunk driver blew through a stop sign and plowed into David's car and killed him instantly. And the circumstances were so tragic and David and his wife Elaine were known and loved by so many that the outpouring of support was large and a bit overwhelming. So at David's visitation, without saying anything, my dad and another colleague sat on either side of Elaine and and held her hands as people came to pay their respects. And that story has a Couple of special layers of connection to our church because the ministry my dad was working for at the time was called CIY Christ in Youth, where we send our students to move and mix every summer. It's the same ministry our daughter Kira is interning with this summer.

And what adds an even deeper layer is that David's wife Elaine, later got remarried to a man named Jim Hutchison, and they had a son named Nate, who is now a church planter in New Zealand that we as a church have supported for a number of years. See, often we love people best not by having the perfect thing to say, but simply by showing up. Many of you know that my dad died really suddenly and unexpectedly in 2014. And I will never forget the day of my dad's visitation in Joplin, Missouri, because as I stood there at my dad's caf, the back doors of the Ozark Christian College Chapel open, and in walked a busload of our church's elders and staff who had driven 500 miles nine hours just to hug me and hug my family and hop back in the bus and drive back to Greenwood. David and Kathy Strange drove separately.

They stayed the night. They attended my dad's memorial service the next day. And I didn't get to talk or hang out with with any of my Greenwood Christian friends for very long. But it meant the world to me that they went to that kind of trouble to be there. And I love telling that story.

When you've gone through painful times, who was there for you? I'll bet you remember. How could you do the same thing for somebody else? You know, we can't always remove people's pain, but we can come alongside them as they hurt. And because we want to be people who don't just show up, but people who show up in a way that's actually helpful.

Could I offer us some very simple and practical guidance in helping others who are hurting? Let me start by sharing a few don'ts. Okay. Number one, don't say, I know exactly how you feel, because you don't. You may have walked through similar circumstances, but just as we are all unique, so are our relationships, our losses, and our emotions.

You know, my experiences of loss and pain are not identical to your experiences of loss and pain. And I don't really help you if I try to imply that they are. A second thing I would encourage us not to do is don't minimize their problems. Sometimes you hear someone talk about whatever is frustrating them and you hear someone say, well, it could be worse or welcome to the club, or sounds like a first world problem to me, or I'd love to trade issues with you, all of which comes across as condescending. That's not very helpful either.

Number three, could I suggest that we don't offer cliches, saying things like just look on the bright side or There are lots of other fish in the sea or God won't give you more than you can handle. Sounds patronizing. It's like we're trying to just smooth over or gloss over or ignore somebody else's very real hurt. Number four, let me suggest that we don't try to dictate their emotions. If you talk to someone who's hurting and they're struggling with life or they're feeling some disillusionment with God, it does no good to say you shouldn't feel that way.

We feel lots of different things and we don't necessarily get to dial up which emotions we feel at any given moment. What we do have control over and what matters most is how we process and how we act on our emotions. And that's where we can often best help each other. So here are a few do's when it comes to loving, supporting and caring for others who are hurting. Number five do pray for them.

God invites us and Scripture urges us to pray often. Jesus brother James wrote these words. He said, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. Now we established at the beginning of this series that God doesn't always choose to remove our pain.

Sometimes God chooses to step into our pain with us and use it in a transformative and redemptive way. So this text is not a blanket assurance that just because we ask God for healing or just because we we ask him to lift our pain off of us, that he will. What it does indicate is that our openness and our transparency and our faithfulness in prayer are all ways of inviting God's presence and healing in our lives. So I would encourage all of us when someone shares a need with us and asks us to pray for them, to take that seriously. If you ask me for prayer, especially during the busyness that is most Sunday mornings around here, I I'm typically going to try to do two things.

Number one, if at all possible, I'm going to ask could we pray right here, right now? Because I don't trust myself to walk away from that conversation and have 30 others before I get back to my office and remember all the details. So if at all possible, I would encourage you if someone says, would you pray for me? Say, yes, let's pray right now. The second thing I would try to do is I may also ask that you would email me your prayer request so that I can remember the details later and share those with our staff as well.

Speaking of which, you can email your prayer needs to our staff@prayerreenwoodchristian.com anytime. We have a weekly moment where we gather as a team and we lift up all the requests that have been shared with us. It's our privilege to pray for you, so please feel free to share those needs with us anytime. Number six, let me suggest that we do ask what they need. You know, sometimes we make the mistake of assuming that we know best what others need, and we are sometimes wrong about that.

So we give a book that we really enjoy to somebody who doesn't really even like to read, or we make our favorite cheesy casserole. For someone that we didn't realize is allergic to dairy, maybe what they need most is someone to mow their grass or to run an errand for them. And asking is a great way to ensure that our attempts at help really help. Number seven, let me suggest that we do make time to be with them. I think many of us have experienced that when we're hurting, it's easy to feel isolated, to feel alone, even forgotten about.

So when someone you know is going through a hard time, ask if you can stop by and say hi. Ask if you could bring them a meal or ice cream or their favorite coffee to enjoy with them. Ask if they have any food allergies so you don't bring the wrong thing. Right. It's a good thing to invite them to go for a walk with you or to go for a drive just to get them out of the house.

If they don't have allergies and you happen to have access to a dog, you might ask if they'd like some pet therapy. Not everybody appreciates golden retriever therapy, but some people might. You know, making time to be with people who are hurting is a great way to grow our compassion and our empathy. Those are like muscles. They have to be stretched and exercised regularly in order to be useful to us when we need the most.

Number eight, let me say, do touch base regularly. I mean, they may not be ready to talk when you are. It may be that when you're available to them, they may not be available right at that moment. But it never hurts to call or send a text or leave a voicemail to let them know that when they need Someone to listen. You are willing to be one of those people.

And finally, let me suggest that we do share encouraging resources. You know, when the Holy Spirit uses something that you're listening to or something that you're reading to bring someone specifically to mind, text them that scripture. The YouVersion Bible app that many of us use is super handy for that. Just to be able to select a verse or a whole section of verses, copy them, and send it in some, in a text message to somebody else. I, I've done that for a number of people.

I've had people do that for me. It could be that you're listening to some worship music and a song comes to mind that speaks directly, directly to the situation that someone you care about is walking through. So grab that link and send them the song, that book that you found. Really helpful, really instructive. Share that with them.

Send them a link to that podcast or that, that sermon that you just had remind you of them. We need to remember the words of scripture at all times. That a friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity. Paul urges us to rejoice with those who rejoice and to mourn with those who mourn. And these are just a couple of examples of a number of biblical texts that remind us that we cannot always remove people's pain.

That is the reality of the life we live. We can't always remove people's pain, but we can come alongside them as they hurt. And sometimes having someone do simply that, just step into the picture to walk with us and let us know that we're not alone as we struggle is huge. Pain is a barrier to faith for a lot of people. We have a hard time much of the time reconciling what scripture says about the goodness and the mercy of God with all the pain and the suffering that we see swirling, seemingly out of control in our world.

And the longer we live and the more relationally connected we are, the. The more we're going to tend to encounter people who are hurting in some really significant ways. And when we do, we always have a choice to make. Will we insulate ourselves from that hurt? Will we retreat to the safety and the comfort inside the walls of our own personal resort?

Or will we walk through that gate and do what we can to help? As followers of Jesus, we. We have hope because God himself put on flesh and he stepped into our world to meet us in our pain. And we follow his example when we care for those who are hurting and we step into their worlds and come alongside them. Would you pray with me?

Lord Jesus, we thank you for the opportunity to come together this morning.

Father, we gathered today not because everything in our lives is just going swimmingly, not because there's no hurt or pain or frustration or sadness. Father, we come together because you invite us to and because we find comfort in being reminded who you are and what you're up to in our lives and in our world and in being able to share that experience with others who are fellow strugglers. God, I'm thankful for the privilege that you give us of, of doing life in community. And I pray, Lord, that you would help us because of the way that you have wrapped yourself in our pain and our hurt and our sin in order to come to our rescue. Father, give us that same inclination to follow the example of Jesus and step into the lives of those who are struggling and hurting.

God, we're thankful for your compassion and we ask that you would replicate that compassion in our minds and our hearts through the work of your spirit within us and through the example of your people. And we pray that you would help us to make this church, family, this part of our community and our state, a place where it's more and more difficult for people to hurt all alone.

Because our instinct, our Holy Spirit trained instinct, is to notice and to support and to encourage and to come alongside. Father, we love you and we ask you to use us for your glory and for others good. In Jesus name, amen.

Morgan responds in worship. You can sit, you can stand, you can kneel however you want. But we're going to respond in worship to a God who hears our prayers and who knows what we're walking through today. Let's lift our voices as we sing this together.

Oh, the perfect Son of God in all his innocence. You're walking in the dirt with you and me you know knows what living is. He's acquainted with our grief. A man of sorrow. Son of suffering oh blood and tears how can it be?

There's a God who weeps, there's a God who leaves. Oh, praise the one who would reach for me.

Hallelujah to the Son of suffering.

Some imagine, some imagine you are distant and removed but you chase us down in merciful pursuit to the sinner you embrace and the broken you embrace. In the end the proof is in your sin. The end the proof is in your wounds, blood and tears. How can you be? There's a God who weeps, there's a God who leads.

Oh, praise the one who would reach for me.

Hallelujah to the sons of grateful that the cross is the final word today. Your cross, my freedom. Come on, declare it together. Your cross, my freedom, your stripes, my healing. All praise King Jesus.

Glory to God in heaven. Your blood still speaking, your love still reaching. All praise King Jesus, Glory to God forever. Your cross, my freedom, your stripes, my healing all praise King Jesus Glory to God in heaven. Your blood still speaking, your love still reaching your.

Praise King Jesus. Glory to God forever.

Glory to God forever.

Glory to God forever.

Glory to God forever.

Glory to God forever.

Your cross, my free freedom, your stripes, my healing oh praise King Jesus, Glory to God in heaven. Your God still speaking, your love still reaching always. King Jesus, Glory to God forever. Oh, praise King Jesus. Oh praise King Jesus, Jesus all praise King Jesus.

Glory to God forever. All praise King Jesus. All praise King Jesus. All praise King Jesus.

Thanks for being with us today. We've talked about some heavy things over the course of the last few weeks, and we don't presume to know exactly what hurt or pain might exist in your life. You don't know that about me any more than I know that about you. But one of the things we do have assurance of is that God knows exactly what we're going through. The Book of Hebrews tells us that we don't have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are, and yet was without sin.

God put on flesh, which means he knows what it's like to be human. He knows what it's like to be betrayed, to be hurt, to be insulted, to be disappointed. He knows what it's like to struggle. And so one of the best assurances we can offer one another, it's not always that. Hey, we've got a magic solution that makes all the pain and hurt go away.

As much as to say, we are a faith community committed to ensuring that nobody has to go through whatever struggles we're facing on any given day all by ourselves. So we'd love to be of help to you in any way we can. There are a couple of easy ways that you can reach out to us. You can always text the word next to 317-707-9997. Just let us know what's on your heart.

We'd love to follow up and begin that conversation. You're also welcome after every service just to come down to the front where there will be several of us, myself included. We'd love to talk with you, pray with you, answer questions, help you find connection with other people, be that a life group or a Bible study or a place of ministry. The Body of Christ exists so that we can one another, one another, so that we can love and encourage and bless and pray for and support. All the different things that the New Testament instructs us to do happen in this living laboratory environment called the church.

And we want to be there for one another. And so if we can help in any of those ways, we would love for you to reach out with us or reach out to us. As we walk out these doors. We go in the power and the purpose of the Holy Spirit on mission with Jesus to be a voice of compassion, to be a presence of. Of caring and comfort in the lives of people.

Many of those hurts we can anticipate. There may be others that we cross paths with that we're not even aware of right now. But the Spirit of God takes us to those places and enables us together to lift each other up. Thank you for being with us today. Let's go in the power and compassion of Jesus.